Please, no more!

Beware: I will hold no emotion back and will stop typing when I feel like it (this may be loooooong). I need to get some things off my chest. Stop reading now if you think I never complain or if you would like to remain in a good mood!

So, I know it's been a couple days since I took THE test. THE TEST. And Oh my goodness. Lots of words come to mind to describe it. I won't describe it. But there are a few things that can help you understand what I went through (if you care).

First, I hope I passed. Not merely for the fact that it would feel good to know that I am smart enough to have passed. But I NEVER want to go through that again. I don't want to study for it again and I DON'T want sit in that room for two hours getting the crap kicked out of me ever again.

Second, when I walked to the car, Mike mentioned how I didn't look too happy. No, I was NOT happy.

Third, I wish people had not told me that it was an easy test. They took history, not social studies. They had NO idea what Social Studies was like. I don't know if I really would have studied any more, but I just don't want someone telling me they thought the test was easy.

Fourth, the test was NOT EASY! I think I would have to agree with all the other people out there that believe that Social Studies is the hardest test. You have to know everything about everything. For example (this is the only question I will share-and it's not verbatim): In which lobe does the brain register the sense of touch? If you're wondering what that has to do with Social Studies, like I was, it's part of the pyschology section. Everything about everything.

Fifth, I don't think I could have studied any more. How do you study for everything about everything? And it just might have made my brain explode.

Sixth, the study material made by the same company that administers the test is crap. I used the book to study from--study ALOT--and I also took the practice exam provided. I did well and felt good while taking that practice test. The practice test was NOTHING like the real thing.

Seventh, I'm not particularly fond of people telling me that they are sure I will do well. Even if I end up passing, you have no idea if I did well. You weren't there and you have no idea what, and how many, questions I guessed on. Now, I am not angry with ANYONE who has already said that to me. I appreciate the vote of confidence you have shown in me. But, I don't know how to respond without getting emotional.

Eighth, I felt really stupid commenting about how difficult it was to my attorney bro-in-law. Of course the bar exam is SO much more difficult. I don't deny that. I just don't think I was mentally and emotionally prepared for how difficult this was going to be for me.

Ninth, if I don't pass, I will be emotional. You have been warned.

Lastly (ten is a good round number), please don't tell me how you don't study for tests and do well on them anyway. And if you or someone you know took the praxis more than once, please keep that information to yourself. Thank you.

Woops. Sorry, I thought of another one (I'm not a numbers person anyway!) Eleventh, I take everything in life right now and apply it to some concept I studied. I can't take it anymore. I want Social Studies out of my life right now. But, when it's everything about everything, I don't think that will happen... Oh, and I even had a(nother) dream about the exam and the results last night. I just hope I passed.

Epilogue: Thank you to anyone willing to bear with me through this. I hope this will be a thing of the past very shortly.

Post-Epilogue: If you're wondering, I should get the results near the end of August. Be prepared for (an emotional) notification of how I did...